How to Talk Dirty 101: Try These Examples and Expert Tips to Keep Them Coming Back for More

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It’s worth noting that some people genuinely enjoy and prefer silence during sex, and that’s okay too. Dr. Jansen has come across such cases in her practice. But if you have a timid lover who is interested in talking dirty but isn’t sure where to start, you can help them venture out of their comfort zone by teeing up opportunities for them to follow your lead. If you are that timid lover, ask your partner to give you direction on sexy things to say. As with most things to do with eroticism, it’s often the least politically correct things that are some of the biggest turn ons behind closed bedroom doors.

  • If you’re new to dirty talking, you can try it in written form (through messaging / texting each other) rather than talking in person.
  • Naomi is an exceptional Mum, Daughter, Friend and Voice of Reason.
  • Sonny is a man of many colours and we have to celebrate his charming self with all his quirkiness and perhaps his difference of opinions at times.
  • Don’t say anything you’re not uncomfortable saying because it could come off as anxious and nervous and just make the whole thing awkward.
  • That paralyzing feeling of risk most often generated by a fear of negative judgement from the other person, which can be amplified by having been raised in a religious or sexually repressed family, or culture.

DIRTY TALK PHRASES TO KEEP HIM THINKING ABOUT YOU

  • After all, nobody is perfect and every sexual encounter is unique.
  • So, the bottom line – yes, it is a part of the foreplay if used as a foreplay activity, but overall, it is so much more than that.
  • A great sex life craves novelty – and dirty talking with your partner is a great way to turn the heat up in the bedroom.
  • There is a misconception among women that they can’t be feminine, or that they need to be sexually aggressive to turn a man on.

Hop on the phone while you’re masturbating, and describe what’s happening to your partner through voice or text messages; go step by step, and outline exactly what you’re doing, how it feels, and how it looks. “You’ll soon start to realize what kinds of words, phrases, or scenarios turn you on the most,” says Eros. If you’re the one who feels awkward or cringes at the idea of talking dirty yourself, but you find it hot when others do it, know that learning some tips for exactly how to talk dirty can help.

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Why you need to learn to talk dirty

“When you’re trying something new in the bedroom, talking about it can help set the stage and engage your partner’s desires,” Luna Matatas, a sex and pleasure educator, tells Elite Daily. “You can mention that you’re curious about dirty talk and ask what your partner’s experience is with it or what they think about it. If you’re nervous about trying it out or worried about feeling silly — let them know this too. This can give your partner an opportunity to affirm you, and it can help you take the pressure off of performing perfectly.” Plus, if dirty talk isn’t for you, definitely let your partner know. As forced as it sounds when you read it, many of us love hearing dirty talk in the bedroom.

Get better at your sexual communication by talking about your favorite parts and why, anything you learnt, and/or anything you struggled with,” she says. In addition to verbal cues, she also highly recommends that people be on the lookout for non-verbal cues too, as these can be vital to gauge the comfort levels of someone. “Be clear of the line between playful nudging and coercion. Never cross the line into coercion-even in dirty talk — do not confuse that with coercion or sexual power play that is clearly asked for and consented as a part of the dirty talk scene,” Hauser states. “Mutualistic dirty talk is sexy because it’s a positive bid to connect with your partner. And research supports that when these bids are accepted, they not only improve overall relationship satisfaction but ultimately build trust between partners,” says Rullo.

But if you’re fumbling up your tongue tango, it can quickly deflate the mood (not to mention other things). Congrats, you’ve made it to the end of this dirty talk lesson and passed with flying colors. “Showing enthusiasm for what you’re doing and for the person you’re with can help people feel wanted and desired,” says Harris.

Recently I stumbled upon Quinn, which is an app for audio erotica and I am in love with it. Something about listening to a hot Irish guy telling you he wants you… it makes me giggle and also feel loved. I do not rely solely on audio erotica, but I definitely do enjoy it. Audio can take you into a whole new world, set the scene. But music is always a nice way to mask sounds for privacy and to keep the energy flowing and moving. I tend to like something with a good beat or groove.

Is there anything worse than when dirty talk turns bad? The right words whispered by candlelight can make your skin feel like it’s being licked by flames, but all it takes is a single cringy sentence (or even word) to completely kill the mood. Your mind races through a thousand un-sexy possibilities and, after what seems like an eternity of stuttering, your brain decides to combine “lick me” with “do me,” and you practically scream “dick me! Then, start by whispering softly in your partner’s ear. Let your partner get used to you saying certain phrases.